the work for design has been discarded for a few days
i contemplate over Nell's music and some irrelevant readings.
life has not been really good for me for these few months.
dark scars and break outs on the physical self hurts the confidence in me.
no where to run and hide.
i have to stand uptight and hold on to what i can begin or start with.
some jolly good moments with some friends and sweetie.
yet there are times i barely speak about how i feel deep down inside i feel hurt.
i miss times when you can just lie still and smell fresh air or drizzling rain.
and mostly the times when we can take a short walk just to let the cool down.
nell's music is still comforting in some ways.
though the lyrics are melancholy and in search of no light.
like coldplay. they dig down into the hidden part of self.
the inner conscience?
there is this line like this:
i know i am broken but if you can find me then i 'd be beautiful once more.
yeah i want to be beautiful once more.
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